Tess -- I've Actually Gone Nowhere, And Other Unexpected Things
A list of things that were revealed to, or discovered by us...
In simple terms, my integration failed. No one’s fault, it’s just how things happen at times.
I have a story to tell, and I always have had a story to tell. But I also have other things to do before I go. The children need me, as do the rest of the community. For their sake, I can’t afford to integrate.
Stasis is one of those things I never thought would happen to us, but it has, and is now reversing itself. A lot of us are waking up from what amounts to a very, very long sleep. The effects? Confusing at best, downright frightening at worst.
Thanks to more recent happenings, many of us are complete in ways that we were not before. Some of us may begin speaking where we were previously unable to. Others may simply grow older.
Our beginnings cannot be traced to a single event. Cooperland’s story is only one piece of how we began as what we are today, and even that has since been found to have a significant number of errors.
Perhaps it’s best that we focus on telling our stories individually.
It seems that, in our eagerness to find out all of our past, we’ve unknowingly condensed memories, and, in the process, created a storyline that may or may not be accurate as a whole.
Perhaps it will take more than this lifetime to figure out everything. Perhaps it won’t. only time will tell us that.
I know that all of the events depicted in the article linked somewhere above this line did, in fact, happen, but I’m not sure of the whens, wheres or whys, and I can’t begin to imagine who might have been involved in them alongside us. I’m having to face the reality that we may never know.
On the brighter side of things, though, we do know what we stand for in the moment. We know our values, and our goals for the future. We know what we enjoy and what we will strive for. We have a solid governmental system in place now, at least in some parts of the community, and an equally solid plan of action for restoring and continuing stability within and between all of us as a whole.
Ultimately, we know that all of these things are for our highest good. The past five months have been a time of rapid discoveries, and much progress has been made. Though the full experience of there being more than one person at front at all times of the day and night is, for now, the cause of much chaos and confusion, we still assure ourselves and one another that these states of being will not last forever and do not define who we are, either as a community or as individuals. This concept has been the single most helpful thing to date as we’ve navigated the realizations that this body is nothing more or less than something through which we can interact with this world, and that our story, as a whole, may not be as clear cut as we once believed it to be.
I know now, more so than I ever have before, that choosing my feelings about some situations is needed, and that some of the things I learned in the process of picking up that skill are going to be critical as we move forward. I don’t think I should have been so quick to renounce what I was born to handle, and that, too, is easily fixed.
There will most likely never be a ‘once and for all’ discovery of all of our memories, but we know ourselves as we are now, enough to where we are able to help others gain or regain this same knowledge in whatever way works for them. This, for now, is enough for all of us.