Michele and I began writing this paper, shortly before I turned 15, just 9 months before I realized that she and the others existed. I think the thing I remember most about writing this was the feeling that I was not alone in writing it, as though someone was looking over my sholder, and at times contributing to the words below. Of course, now I know what was happening; Michele was, in fact, writing it alongside me, and I thank her for that, because without her contribution this paper wouldn't have been the same. She was, after all, the one who took on the shock and other feelings that I myself couldn't face at the time of the happenings described, and the one who drove me to help her create a document of what had gone on, all without me realizing her doings until the time was right. You'll learn more about her in our upcoming "insider introductions," though, so let's cut to the chace. :)
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March 3, 2015
This is us: a message from one to another.
As indigo children, some of us may struggle in our lives. We may have trouble accepting the fact. Others may not know what to do when they learn this about themselves. Whatever your position in your life, just know that where you are is right where you need to be, and that only by getting through the darkness can you get to the light. I will tell you my story, and perhaps you may find some similarities in your own. Regardless if you do or not, I hope these pages will help you come through any darkness in your life as a result of finding out that you are an indigo child.
I don't remember when my journey first began. My first memory of knowing I was searching for something was when I was ten. During that time, I was interested in meditation in a general way, and I would often go on internet searches without knowing what I was looking for. I never had a goal. I was curious, and would read anything that caught my interest. As time went on, I found specific things to search, such as rebirthing breathwork and other alternative ways of healing. I didn't know where my searching would take me. But my life was about to change.
My searches were mostly on the internet. However, there were two experiences that I had in person with two different people. The first was in a small shop where I live. The most vivid detail I remember about that time was how I could not stop shaking. The woman there, who was the only worker in the store, didn't seem to think that was a bad thing. She used it to determine which cd out of two I should buy. That experience opened my eyes to the fact that people like her were not far off. They were right here in Alaska.
There was more to come. My mother and step father were getting married. Friends and some of mom's coworkers came, and it was a very happy day for them. I remember being up stares in my mom's room, and there being one of her coworkers with her, helping her get her dress on. Her and I started talking, and I don't remember what we talked about, but one comment still remains with me to this day. She told me I was nature's child. I didn't understand her message, so asked her for clarification. She said something along the lines of, "You are an indigo child."
After the wedding, we sat down and talked. It was a conversation unlike any other I had had before. By the end of it, I was in shock. The whole reality hadn't quite sunk in yet. I remember her telling me that we as a group were the saviors of the others around us. For the next two weeks, I felt held down by the knowledge. I felt that I could not do it, and that the task at hand was too much to do alone. But I was not alone, and when I realized this, my whole life became lighter.
For me, the most stressful part of learning that I am an indigo child was the feeling of being responsible for everyone in the world. Everyone deserves to live without fear and guilt. It is your birthright. If someone tells you something like what I was told, don't think that you have to change in order to try to meet their standard. We were born this way, and it's not going to help anything trying to act like something you're not. Just be you, because that's all that really matters. Don't let being an indigo stop you from living. Young or old, small or large, black or white, it doesn't matter.
This message is for everyone, not just the group mentioned here. I hope that we as a group can realize that it's not labels or words that define who we are, it's our actions, and that just because someone points out something about us that we may or may not know, that doesn't mean that we have to change anything about who we are. Don't take just one person's word for it; ask around and take to the net if you have to. But above all, don't let it stop you from being you, and from living your life, your way. You can only be you. Don't change for the sake of a label, because you are who you are for a reason. It doesn't matter if you see yourself as confusion, or if you see yourself as clarity; if you see yourself as light or dark. If you are nothing more, and nothing less than, yourself, you will find people who are like you.